Creativity now is as important in education as literacy and we should treat it with the same status. - Sir Ken Robinson

I was talking about art last month, and I did go out, get some supplies, and while I haven’t started painting yet, I’ve started drawing and letting loose. I’ve tried to just do it without any pressure, but I’ll admit to feeling a bit sheepish when I have these little piggy drawings on my sketchpad that make me feel three years old again (not in a good way).

But there’s years of conditioning there, and I’m very committed to breaking it. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life saying, “I painted in high school, but not really…” or “I think I would have been good at art” or “Sometimes I wish I could draw that, but I don’t have the talent.”

What is talent, anyway? In writing, art, architecture, or anything else? There are several people who don’t like what I write. Does that make me talentless? Just because a majority thinks I CAN write, does that mean I have talent or that I’ve conformed to their idea of what makes talent?

I’ve tried never to conform to anyone’s idea in life and in my work, so the fact that my work is appreciated simply makes me lucky, not any more or less talented than the next person. But I find that the more I’ve worked towards achieving what makes a “good story,” it’s become an even harder risk to do something wacky in my work. I worry about being labeled a certain way, or writing a certain thing that won’t fit in with the submission guidelines.

I’ve recently started becoming less bound by these guidelines, and more by what feels right on the page to me, and that scares me a bit. I suspect there’s years of conditioning in there too. Sure, I have to make a living, which means I may have to write to a certain style, but should it be at the expense of giving up my original voice completely? The better I do in terms of publishing credits and money, the more I’m losing the “me” in my work. There’s something inherently wrong about that picture.

(I was very hesitant to post this for fear that you’d all think I’d run off the deep end, but I suppose that’s part of the process too. If you comment, would you please be a little gentle? Vulnerable woman here.)

I came across this little gem after I bought my art supplies (a little nudge from the Universe, I like to think). Give it a listen if you have about 20 minutes. It’s quite funny, too.