Archive for ◊ April, 2008 ◊

26 Apr 2008 Seeing Red

For the first time in my writing career, I’m in the red financially.

Oh sure, payments are being cut out as we speak, and I keep hearing that the “check is in the mail” but it’s anyone’s guess as to when it’ll be “in the bank.”

This from editors who promised to start paying on acceptance, and those who thanked me for saving their asses and coming through on near-impossible deadlines.

A job at McDonald’s suddenly sounds very appealing.

25 Apr 2008 HARO

Here’s a discovery: a PR guy who doesn’t bombard you with off-target pitches. A PR guy who actually wants to help reporters by providing a much-needed service. A PR guy who provides this service for free.

Such a PR guy exists? Yeah, who knew?

I wouldn’t have believed it either, except that I know of Peter Shankman (http://shankman.com) and have been a fan of his service ever since it started. (I was among the first hundred on Facebook.)

Help A Reporter Out (HARO) is a free service for reporters that started off as a Facebook group, but now has grown into an e-mail list with thousands of subscribers. The purpose is to help reporters find case studies, experts and people on the street for their stories.

How it works is this:
1. Go to www.helpareporter.com
2. If you’re a PR person, sign up for the main list. You get three e-mails a day letting you know which reporter wants what.
3. If you’re a journalist, fill in this form here: http://www.helpareporter.com/press

That’s it. Easy.

24 Apr 2008 Transitions
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This PC to Mac transition is killing me. I’m still unable to access my data, I’m behind on e-mails and deadlines, and I’m struggling to learn new keyboard shortcuts and file systems. I’ll post on and off for the next couple of days while I get this stuff sorted out and try to get out of Delhi.

That blank page I mentioned a few days ago filled up pretty quickly. It’s still not officially on paper yet, so I’m not going to talk about what’s coming up, but maybe I’ll tell you a bit about what’s been going on in my head for the past few months.

When I moved to Ghana, I actually didn’t plan to come back this soon. I really did intend to “move.” The plan was to get my visa renewed, keep Ghana as the base, and maybe travel through the continent. I went there to work on child trafficking, but mostly, I just wanted to live in Africa. Get out of India. Get away from the cultural expectations of India.

Midway through my stay in Ghana, I decided not to renew my visa after all. I didn’t intend to come back to India– Japan/Thailand seemed to be on the cards at that point– but I had decided that I needed to keep moving. Personal, professional, and financial factors all played a part as well. Japan and Thailand didn’t work out, eventually, so I sat down with my blank page and decided only to chalk out the next week, the next day, the next minute, and let the rest of it fall into place on its own. (It’s very easy for me to do this now, after years of practice!)

So I came back to India with the faith that my next course of action would become clear to me if I kept a little bit of patience. It has. Both personally and professionally, for the first time, I feel like I’m heading towards where I need to be. Where I’ve always wanted to be.

I’m still keeping that pencil handy though.

23 Apr 2008 The “M” Word

One of the things that surprised me most about living in Ghana was how, on a daily basis, random people (and I mean really random—taxi drivers, hotel receptionists, bartenders, etc) felt absolutely no hesitation in asking me, “How old are you? Are you married? Why not?” (See why I felt right at home?)

In Africa, I was proposed to at least twice a week. Not asked out. Proposed to. My suitors included businessmen, taxi drivers (one asked me to give him my cell phone and when I refused, he wondered if I’d consider marrying him instead), college students, and even boys so young, I’m fairly sure I’d be in an African jail had I taken them up on their offers.

I would try to come up with a new reason every day as to why I’m so old (I’m 26!) and still unmarried. I’m sorry to say that I wasn’t able to come up with even one that worked. Apparently, like in India, “I don’t want to be,” isn’t good enough.

Didn’t stop me from trying though.

**

“I’m interested in someone back home.”
“Is he white?”
“Uh… yeah.”
“He won’t marry you. I’ll marry you.”

(White man I know and like who (presumably) will never get married vs. African guy I’ve met five minutes ago who’ll get married right away. See how tough my life’s choices are?)

**

“Why do you want to marry me anyway?”
“You beautiful. You give good baby.”
“Wha… wow.”
“Yes, your face and my personality. Good baby.”
“What if it’s your face and my personality? You’ll be sorry then, won’t you?”

(He actually went into silence after that one. I’m trying very hard not to see it as a reflection on my personality.)

**

“I’m sorry, I simply can’t marry someone who’s religious. Because I’m not.”

(This person never spoke to me again.)

**

And my all-time favorite:

“Dude, you don’t even know me!”
“I know you.”
“Yeah? What’s my name?”
“I don’t know. What’s your name?”
“Mridu.”
“So your name is… uh… Mreembu? See now I know you.”

22 Apr 2008 Burnt Toast and Other Philosophies of Life by Teri Hatcher

Rating: * * *

Comments: I’m not the target audience for this book. I am neither a single mom, nor forty, nor American, nor can I identify with most of what this book is about. Which is why I didn’t really enjoy this book as much as someone who fits that demographic likely would. Some good lessons in here though.

**

FROM THE BOOK:

Last week was horrible, but this week doesn’t have to be connected to it.

… life doesn’t move in straight lines. We’re imperfect and conflicted and puffy-eyed. We’re alternately burdened and strengthened by our pasts, but we always have the power to rebound. We have another shot on the golf course. A new job. A fresh morning. A chance to ask forgiveness. Another picnic with another cliff. We may have doubts, but we control the present. We always have the choice to move forward with hope and confidence.

When it comes to changing yourself there are two schools of thought. You can work from the inside, trying to understand the history of all your feelings and how you got to be the way you are. Then, eventually you can try to use those realizations to change your life. Or you can start from the outside, acting the way you want to be, even if you don’t feel it yet. Eventually it will sink in.

The only thing as bad as the end of the world is the actual end of the world.

It takes work to not try and fix things all the time. Sometimes you just have to let it sit.

The thing is, sometimes you just have to wait. There isn’t anything you can do to accomplish something faster than it actually can be done.

Even when things go wrong, when you suffer a burn or change recipes on the fly, you have more chances of success than you think.

My reason for taking this risk, for exposing myself, is the same reason we all should expose ourselves. Love and truth go hand in hand.

20 Apr 2008 To Do Before I’m 30: #1, 132

#1: Travel to 15 countries - 2/15

My trip to Ethiopia wasn’t planned. As it so happened, I was supposed to fly back to Delhi and the airline screwed up my ticketing and refused to let me board my plane. I was insulted, mistreated, and made to wait for hours while my flight took off. Without me.

I later received an apology, a free hotel stay, and a trip that should have lasted twelve hours ended up lasting four days. The only good thing that came out of it was that I managed to visit Ethiopia’s capital city, Addis Ababa, and actually spend some time there. Not enough to be able to discover the culture and people, but good enough to get a feel of the place. Of course, I loved that part.

So, I’m back in Delhi. But not for long.

**

#132: Buy a MacBook

I’ve been saying I need a new computer for the past one year. It sputtered and it crawled, it made weird old guy noises, and every two weeks, something broke– I was, at one point, using an external keyboard, an external mouse, had no CD or DVD drive, and required a restart every one hour. It didn’t help that the guy I paid to fix it a few months ago installed a pirated version of Windows and MS Office, even though–and you’ll understand my frustration at this–I paid for and have the original Windows software! All of it.

Anyway. Two hours after I arrived in Delhi, SpongeBob (don’t ask how it got named that), sputtered for the final time and died. (I think it was waiting to come home for the last time.)

I now have an as-yet-unnamed shiny new MacBook (and really, about two months ago, I was not one of those people who named their computers. I blame a certain guy). If you don’t see any entries on the blog for a couple of days, it’s probably because I’m playing with my new toy. I love my toys.